I was listening to Bonnie Tyler’s I Need A Hero from the movie Footloose, and thinking yeah, I need a hero too. Love the song, love the movie, love the entire thing. But let’s be real about it. I love being the hero in my own story as well.
Or in my case, the heroine.
Sally in the Zen Caregiver – Hero
Has a ring to it. Not a hero sub. Not a hero sandwich.
Just an ordinary girl who loves her elderly father and mother. Sometimes the ordinary is truly the extraordinary by the sheer simplicity of it all.
If I lost you, just read on. I’m in a writing zone this early Sunday morning and I’m feeling it.
Sometimes, as a caregiver, it takes a lot to get out of bed in some mornings. Some days it actually takes a superhuman effort to put one foot in front of the other. And in between those times, sometimes I wish for the burden to be shouldered by someone else for a bit.
And it weighs pretty heavy on the heart sometimes. Not gonna lie. It does. The heaviness of life and the baggage that it comes with sucks lemons.
But when I reframe it in my heart and my head, I want and need being the hero in my own life story.
Because it’s my life.
Heroes come in all shapes and sizes but they usually come with admirable qualities that rival Captain America. But for me, I’m attracted to qualities that I know are embodied in me.
Being a Hero Means: Do It with Grace
Photo by Jan Canty on Unsplash
When it’s an especially tough moment, I take a deep breath and give myself a few moments to reset. Shirking things isn’t in my DNA so taking a mental break is the start of getting back to myself. I don’t normally get upset or easily set off by irritating and annoying things, but I do have my limits. But no matter what, I believe that difficulties are a bitch that we need to deal with directly by simply going through them.
A test from the Universe and God. Can I be grace under their fire?
Another Hero Quality: Cry it Out
Sometimes I get overwhelmed by it all. And as I’ve gotten older, I’ve gotten more emotional too. Used to think it was pretty funny how some people can cry at commercials…until I became one of them.
But after a good long cry, the release that follows is clean. Like a fierce thunderstorm that blew in and blew away the debris and leaves in its huge sweeps of wind and rain. The clean-up afterwards, for me anyway, usually involves a huge cup of freshly brewed Starbucks in my hand.
Being a Hero in My Own Story Means: Know that You’re Never Truly Alone
No matter what. There’s a special essence within me, within us all, frankly, that always walks with the Universe. I usually think of it as my intuition. The toughest part is being able to hear it. Among the mess of being a human with an ego, sometimes that quiet voice is never heard. And it waits patiently for that time, if it ever comes, for you to become aware of it.
And the source of my intuition? Treading onto the woo-woo for a moment here, need I say what it is? I’m Zen Buddhist and all things (seen and unseen) are real. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, then that’s a brain teaser for you to figure out.
And along with the special quality within us, we do walk among angels. May be in a form of a friend lending her shoulder for you to cry on or a brief interaction at the supermarket.
And I think that’s pretty cool.
Most of all, being a Hero Means: Pivot
Learn to go through the difficulties by pivoting. Nothing is truly a dead-end. Remember that when God closes the door, he opens a window. Sometimes it may be an actual hindrance standing in my way to my goal. And just sometimes it’s in my head.
And when it’s in my head, I know then that there’s something I need to learn because I need to change my perspective on the situation. In order to do that, I need to learn. From learning comes the change, and from the change comes the newer perspective in learning how to deal.
How to get out of the situation and move forward.
And I’m all about moving forward, better, stronger and with a clearer head.
Now, that’s empowering.
And I truly believe that by being a hero in my own story makes me a good ally in others.
And a better caregiver to Zen Master and Zen Mum.
Sally in the Zen
